Scan o’ Gram for the Holidays

The talk around the dinner table goes something like this:

“Yes, isn’t it great, Timmy?   Grandma will be coming for a visit this holiday! And Timmy, please be thoughtful if Grandma seems  a little upset when she gets here. Why? Well, unfortunately Timmy, Grandma has to  fly naked.  Well, not technically naked. It’s just that  in order to get on the plane  she does need to flash the TSA agents with a full naked front and back body view or else  she will be required “BY LAW” to allow a stranger, who spends her entire day groping other strangers, to touch her in ways that nobody has since Grandpa died. Why, you ask? Well, the US government doesn’t know Grandma and so they don’t trust her not to blow up a plane.  So  in order to get to know her better, they politely ask her to take off her clothes.”

Yes, it has really come to this. The biggest defense budget of the free world has determined the best way to keep us all safe is to take us back to the basics…. naked came I into this world, and that view  belongs to the government if they so choose to take it.

Any of the social accoutrements of earned success you surround yourself with, position, power, money, education, recognition, age, can disappear in a flash of back-scattered radiation pointing to  a “blurry groin”.  Just ask  comedic wit Dave Berry, recently forced into the “groping” section of the airport after failing his  full body scan.

Well, I say good! Wonderful!  Finally! Something to shake awake the sleeping majority.  Touch them where it shocks, and maybe, just maybe, the public will finally stand up and swat away the hand of  “security”, as it tries to calm them with the disclaimer,  ” This is for your own good. ”

It’s long past time to wake up to the intolerable encroachment of invasive measures on personal freedom here in the US. Big Brother  already  watches you from satellites and “security cameras” everywhere,  listens to everything you talk about on your cell phone and reads everything you write on the internet. Now he wants to have his hands down your pants while leering at your naked body.

Having your grandmother, spouse, mother, father, or child, virtually  strip searched or intimately groped might finally be the last straw.

I certainly hope so.



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